Perplexity at it's best

Now...at this juncture....my mind is perplexed with too many thoughts. Some times  I'm thinking of going for higher studies and sometimes to flourish in professional life.....but this Indian traditional and unclear thinking is driving me crazy...no creativity in thoughts and not even letting allowing people to think so....it is taking me in a state of asphyxiation......I need room for myself...to think - to create....... to develop a proper attitude in life..  

Shift 'A','B'&'C'

After quite a long time i came back to blogging..though not with the same subject I proposed to write but with a different this time....huh..Friend have obviously helped me to cope with various odd situation but right now I'm really alone.In college what ever specialization we had,what ever different thought we had still we really had time for each other but now I do have a feeling that this job has made life quite self-centric for every one.

College Started

Today is 4th of August 2010,the earth has completed 5 complete revolution and 1 complete rotation since I first joined the college.It was a different feeling.How do I describe how I felt??? It was as if I have seen world enough and in a position to say how it works. I really had a proud feeling,that I have crossed THE Barrier...ha ha ha and then when I look down upon the kids of class 11 and 12 struggling hard get a descent rank in competitive exams I really feel pity for them. An air of pride always encircled me that I belonged to an esteemed institution...that I came here to complete my degree in engineering (hardly knew the meaning of the word "engineering" then).Serious always or may be I should say showing off a bit how serious I was. We people, when attended the first lecture we were over cautious,gave as much importance we could give to the teacher even more than the subject(which required some).We really had high hopes regarding there intelligence and qualification.I can't say about every one but my judgment about every teacher was in great dilemma till my "technical interaction" started(another part and parcel of the bachelors degree).

Contd.........

I’m pretty bad with dates sometime in the month of July I went to college for my counselling..actually I reached to Durgapur a day before...in the evening I went to see the college...The college stood beside the avenue named after a person who after his death made Post Master General and a share broker insane in India.....guess who???Look into your wallet...he is laughing.....may be adjusting his head with the marijuana leaves.....Mahatma Gandhi .I got down from the bus in front of the main gate and gave a glance at the main gate 20 feet high with a dim light twinkling at it’s head and (2-3)some of the students(my would be respected sirs and madams) relishing the spicy recipe of the food court situated right outside the main gate..we call it the “jhups”(whose roofing,pillaring and the sitting arrangement for the guest are provided by the same baniyan tree) ..actually I had a notion that the engineering students are the anti social elements of the society-(may be due to the ragging factor) and the evening’s crepuscular charm made their residence look more like a devil’s nest than my would be address(i didn’t know then).On the gate,a placard was tied where the information is given to the over caring parent the they come exactly to the right place for their son’s /daughter’s counselling. Neway I didn’t wait there, I was waiting there opposite the gate to catch a bus to come back to my hotel room...when I mate a senior I remember his face but not his name(sorry for that) and how innocently I asked him “dada ekhane ragging hoi?”,”na na sudhu ektu kotha bolahoi, lok e bole ragging” he replied. “Oh!!!! thank god”, I said....”I can study now” just like any other fucking topper of my or of other department. What people say and what actually they do, I understood ten days later after joining the college......

It All Started................

Today from about 2PM I was sitting at the scoop at the Princep Ghat Station having a chocobrownie while reminiscing the part of life circle I believe to have created for myself....after 2 days I’ll be 23 yrs old ....... My personal life has never been so interesting, but friends made it look like one. The negative part of the sinusoidal curve of my life extended far below my expectation..... woffffffffffffffffffff!!!!!!!! But the little silver lining that I had was due to my friends who changed my view point to look towards my life....my life looked much simpler then, flowing like a mountain spring and flying like dove in the vastness of the sky delivering the spirit of freedom to be installed in the heart and soul of every human being....when they can say “Well let’s think positive”, ”Let’s ameliorate the world ” or to do something to make this place a better place to live in......Heavy words isn’t it.....But it’s so simple to think 30 sec after you take a puff of Marijuana...(a birthday gift from my friends...this birthday came every day in my life).....And to execute those ideas u need one more b’da gift.... tht’s whisky....whatever brand that may be gives you such an adrenaline pump that u feel like Sunny Deol for a sec taking tons and tons of Pakisthani commandos with latest war gadgets alone with a 303 rifle and crossing the international border without a security check thereby getting your job done in half an hour (Since Sunny Deol extra terrestrial activity last for the last 30 mins). So when u “think” there got to be no hindrance, and when you” execute” there’s got to no hindrance as well. When u “think” and when you” execute” you become famous...when u become famous people imitate you and you become a hero....what else do u need to make you happy for that moment and when u add such moment u remain happy throughout your life....then there is no need to tap your heart and say “All is well”. Thus moral of the story is :- hmmmmmm.........leave it for now “Lets’ praise at departing”

The most famous quarter of my life cycle is the one that constituted my college life.Hoh!!!!

to be contd.......

The Confession

This blog will be about my confession,confession to friends who may not have been credited for in true sense......for making and shaping my life to what I'm today......